What if there existed some magic pill that’s purpose was to make your life better in every single way imaginable? It made your thoughts clearer, your sleep better, gave you more energy, gave you more confidence, made you physically stronger, reduced your stress, and there was no hangover the next morning. No nasty side effects. Everything just gets better…your career, your sex life, your ability to learn, and your ability to think all become better in a recognizable way. No compromised immune system, no moodiness, drowsiness, nausea, diarrhea, none of it. Only the true and healthy you. Would you take that drug?
I’m certainly not the first person to make the point I’m about to make, but considering the current circumstance and the absolute lack of messaging on the part of the mainstream media, I think it can’t be stated enough. And this is not a popular opinion, even before the pandemic, and it isn’t popular for a multitude of reasons, the main reason being that we all know we should be doing it. We know so well, that it’s hardly even an opinion.
I’m talking about the extremely difficult yet extremely necessary act of taking care of our bodies.
You’ve heard it before and you don’t want to hear it again, but it remains true as it always has. In this pandemic, everyone wants to talk about "the" science and "the" data. Well, there’s endless literature of science and data pointing to the significance of a healthy diet and exercise and what it does for both the quality and expectancy of our lives. God forbid if Big Brother Anthony Fauci got on television and told the American people to put down the bag of Cheetos and pick up an apple, like a doctor is supposed to say, how much better off we might be. Even the CDC, who by no means has encouraged a healthy sustainable diet or even so much as a pushup during this pandemic, found that 78% of people hospitalized with Covid-19 are overweight. That's a big fuckin' number, and it’s their study, not mine. Maybe they don’t pump this statistic into the headlines because they assume that we already know. The truth is that we should be eating healthy and exercising, for it is by no means surprising to us or any country in the world that Americans are fat.
“Americans love to eat. They are fatally attracted to the slow death of fast food. This country is big time, pig time. Forget the bald eagle. You know what the national emblem of this country ought to be. A big bowl of macaroni and cheese. A BIG bowl because everything in this country is king-sized. King-sized, extra-large, and super-jumbo. Especially the fucking people!”
-George Carlin
Being fat as Americans is so well known that we’ve accepted it, are okay with it, and in certain circumstances are even encouraging it. And while we can applaud magazine models for their plus-sized photoshoot covers and shame Adelle for turning her body around and taking care of herself, at the end of the day, the facts speak for themselves. The plus-sized model is susceptible to nearly every imaginable health risk while Adelle’s risk has substantially decreased in every way.
Again, the “trustworthy” CDC itself has made public a list of increased health risks for being overweight. These have nothing to do with Covid.
High Blood Pressure
Type Two Diabetes
Coronary Heart Disease
Stroke
Many types of Cancer
Body Pains
Breathing Problems
This isn’t the whole list.
Heart Disease and Cancer are the two leading causes of death in the United States. Covid is third. Obesity makes people susceptible to all three. What are we doing? Why does no one seem remotely interested in the heart disease pandemic that’s been going for twenty years strong? Did we just shut down gyms, but write in policies that kept places like McDonald’s open to ‘feed America’?
My theory is that no one cares to hear this because it requires a deep level of self-reflection. Maybe that means I lack empathy. But I don’t need empathy because I was fat once. Self-reflection, as painful as it was, pulled my fat ass away from the Crunchwrap supremes.
One of the more memorable conversations of my life was between my mother and me at the start of my eighth-grade year. She bought me a pair of pants to start the semester, made me try them on, and they didn’t fit. No big deal. I was a sweet growing boy after all. Only, my mom let a comment slip. “I might have to buy you the husky sized.” I understood context clues well enough to know what ‘husky sized’ meant. I was a fat kid. Facts are facts. Now, I could have said my mom was being a horrible person who was bullying me by telling me my pant size, but she wasn’t. She was only acknowledging that her fat kid needed some fat kid pants. I’m thankful that she acknowledged this because otherwise, I would have continued about my life addicted to Coca-Cola and potato chips. And even hearing this unflattering comment on my plus-sized pants, it still took me two years to do jack shit about it. I gave up soda in 10th grade and started working out the same year.
Let me make it clear that I love food. We all should love food. We live off of it after all. It’s matter from the earth that we integrate into our bodies. But food is even more than that. Food is our culture. Food becomes our life. We use it for the biological purpose of nourishing our cells, our systems, and our physiology. We use it to nourish our souls. Many of us even schedule our days around eating. We schedule outings and dates around eating. In societies, people with food prosper. Without it, societies perish and crumble. Food is not our enemy. But let’s make it clear that edible garbage is, even if it tastes otherwise!
Try this the next time you go into a bag of Cheetos and pull one out. Hold the Cheeto up before your eyes and say out loud, “This is food.” Observe it closely, the Cheeto. Twirl it around in your fingers and take a good hard look. Notice the residue left on your skin. Is that a natural color? Smell it. Smell it closely. Does it smell like real cheese? Press it between your fingertips and listen. Does any other food sound like that when you squeeze it? If so, what kind of food? Why does it sound like that? Tell yourself again, “This is food.” Then ask yourself, “Is it?” And sure, you could be a smart ass about this whole practice, or you could ask yourself. You’re not asking, “Does this taste good?” Or telling yourself, “I want to put this in my fat maw.” You’re asking, “Is the Cheeto food?”
Taking a moment to ask if what you are about to consume is...well...food is a great way to begin thinking critically about what you should put inside of your body. Over time, with some self-care and a touch of dreaded discipline, you’ll even begin to create a boundary for yourself. You’ll likely find that when you start giving your body real food, it’ll start to reject the garbage you’ve accustomed it to. Be generous. Give it lots of food, because your body is, first and foremost, likely lacking nutrients. Hell, even learn how to cook real food. It’ll impress someone you love or someone you’re trying to…share a meal with.
I suppose that if you’ve made it this far that you’ve likely prepared an onslaught of excuses to validate why you’ve been dieting as shitty as you have been. No worries. That’s to be expected. The ‘eating healthy is expensive’ or ‘I’m waiting until after the _______(wedding, holidays, Mardi Gras, Sunday)’ are common ones, as well as the rare, ‘I read an article that says working out it bad for you’ (Yes, I’ve actually heard this). Your mind might care about all that bullshit, but your body does not, nor does nature. You have one body. Yes, we’re all different, and I’m not suggesting some vain cult shit where everyone tries to look their best. This isn’t about vanity, it’s about your health. You have one body. You’ll have it for as long as you do, and like everything else, it will deteriorate over time. You can either expedite the process, or you can give it a good go-round, stay in the fight, and give yourself a healthy body to be proud of. What possible excuse could you have to not take care of it? You live in a democratic nation (or at least I assume so) with every possible food known to man available to you. If you don’t like the taste of healthy food, you should aim to acquire one as quickly as possible because shit edible garbage is killing you, and even if it hasn’t won yet, it’s increasing your chances of being in constant pain, increasing your chances of depression, increasing your chances of catching Covid (even if you’re vaccinated), and decreasing your chances of anyone wanting to touch your genitals. On the flip side, a moderately healthy diet and even just half an hour of exercise a day can flip each of those things. Every day you don’t eat well or exercise, you should look at yourself and ask, why?
Are you addicted to edible shit for the taste or the chemical reaction that it’s giving your brain? Are you eating fast food because it’s cheap and fast or because you can’t stop thinking about how good it’ll taste? Are you eating because your body is craving nutrients, or are you eating because you just need something salty? Ask yourself specific questions about your diet. Make a plan financially. Even just incorporating some lame rule like ‘an apple a day,’ or ’25 pushups’. Something. Just get started. Sure, it’s going to suck. Sure, it’s going to hurt. Sure, it’s going to be difficult. But even if your mind is telling you that all of it feels like shit, your body is benefitting from each difficult decision you make in the right direction. And you already know the right direction.
First hand, I know that the mental barrier is the toughest to cross. Everyone’s different when it comes to self-care. I know I have to attack myself with tough love. That’s the only way I change. Maybe you’re like that, but maybe you’re not. Part of self-care is the discovery of how you best care for yourself. Maybe you are rewards-based. If so, do 25 pushups and allow yourself an apple. You have to do you in your way, but without a doubt, the most difficult part isn’t going to be giving up soft drinks, or the chips, or the fast food, or the Netflix over the run. The most difficult part will without a doubt be confronting your mind and the habits it has already built.
“To know your enemy, you must become your enemy.”
-Sun Tzu
Your mind will be your enemy before you make it your ally. Do you know your mind? Do you know the excuses that it has lined up? Do you know how far it will go to convince you that you’re too tired or sore to work out? How your day was too long and tough to take an hour to cook something healthy? Pizza sounds good on a day like that, doesn’t it?
Nurture and care for your body long enough and your mind will follow suit. It has no choice. Your body is the only thing keeping your mind alive. The mind does not work without the body and a healthy body will create a healthier mind.
Learn the balance of being tough on yourself, but also having grace in accepting your mistakes. You will make them. You mustn’t destroy yourself in the process of becoming better just because you have a slip-up. Slip up, recognize it, and move on.
Also, do not doubt the effect of propaganda. It’s there for a reason and it works. Is it a surprise that McDonald’s catchphrase is ‘I’m loving it’? That Popeyes is ‘Love that Chicken’? That Taco Bell’s is ‘Live Mas’ or ‘Live More’? All of these seemingly harmless little slogans all make suggestions for the types of things we want the most. Not the burger. The love. I’m loving it. You may, ‘Love that Chicken’, but why? Because it tastes good? Sure, it tastes good, but nearly anytime anyone eats Popeyes, they can’t go two hours without feeling obligated to make a joke about how they have the shits. ‘Live Mas’ is almost insulting considering that if you eat more Taco Bell, every imaginable statistic suggests that you will almost certainly, ‘Live Less.’
But you are living less. Most of us are. We’re not as healthy as we could be. And what if you were? Because guess what? No matter where you are in the journey of this whole thing, you could be. That is a fact.
How would that look? How would you feel about yourself? Maybe you’d love your life.
It takes a magic pill. A pill that’s is superbly difficult to swallow.
Self-care is the fourth of the Seven Deadly Virtues.